When I became a mom I worried a lot and I still do. At the beginning of his life, I worried whether my son had enough clothes, diapers, and food. You know the usual and important things to keep a baby alive and comfortable. But my mind slowly trailed into worrying about irrelevant things that I thought mattered when being a new mother, but in the grand scheme of things, I found my son only cares about the top 3 things listed at the beginning of this blog post. Based on my experience I'm going to share with you my top 8 things that you care about as a mom that your baby or toddler doesn’t.
How They Were Born
Whether through a vaginal birth, c-section, or surrogate. They are here healthy and happy with you now. I had a planned c-section because the ultrasound said my baby would be 9 lbs and my doctor said that I was probably too narrow down there to deliver safely. But to our surprise, he was only 7.9 lbs when he was born. He came out healthy with no problems which is what I should’ve been happy with. But I felt stupid taking that option. I had the option to try doing it the traditional way but I was made known of the risks that could happen like him getting stuck or breaking his shoulders causing permanent nerve damage! That was too much of a scary thought that whatever was the safest was the best. I felt good making that decision for my baby, but now that I know after the fact he was way smaller than predicted why do I feel bad about it? After a while since his birth, I stopped feeling bad, because what good was that doing me? My baby is healthy with me today because of that decision. I can’t predict the future, and neither can you. Every woman’s birth experience is different and some are very traumatic. But our kids don’t care how they got into the world, all that matters to them is that they made it into our arms. So don’t be hard on yourself or tell yourself what you could’ve done differently. I would do the same thing again if it meant the same result.
How You Fed Them
A fed baby is a happy baby! Let me say it again to the people in the back. A FED BABY IS A HAPPY BABY! Breastfeeding is tough and for some ladies, it doesn’t come as easy, and for others, it’s easy peasy. Even though I was able to breastfeed I am the last to judge a woman for bottle feeding or formula feeding. Some women have trouble producing enough milk and some woman have an intense working schedule that makes pumping impossible. Yes, breast milk is the best option but for some women being able to breastfeed isn’t possible and that's ok. Your child only cares about getting their belly full. And as long as your baby is getting the thumbs up from their pediatrician and is getting all the nutrients they need you have nothing to worry about.
How Fancy Their Nursery Is
When I had my son one of the things I felt so guilty about was not having a proper nursery. When I envisioned myself having kids I wanted them to have a nicely decorated room with a pretty crib, rocking chair, artwork, and closet space. But when I became pregnant way earlier than I anticipated, we had to live with my parents for my son’s first year before we got home. I needed to move back home to get help for the baby and my son’s nursery was in my dad’s old office. We got creative with what we had to make the room functional and let me tell you it was not fancy at all. Sometimes I would feel guilty that we had to carve out space instead of having a space ready beforehand. But when I thought about it critically I realized having a fancy nursery is more for the parents than it is for the baby. I felt bummed that I missed the experience of decorating a nursery and picking out things or having a special theme. But, when I look back at our makeshift nursery at my parent's home. He had everything he needed. My son had diapers, wipes, medicine, and lotion. He doesn’t need a fancy room he can’t remember. I don’t even remember my nursery them as a kid, and I certainly don’t recall it having any effect on my life. So don’t beat yourself up if you don’t have money for a fancy nursery.
Where You Live
As I mentioned before my husband and I lived with my parents during my son’s first year. It wasn’t ideal but it was necessary. It got cramped at times because my younger sister lived at home as well during her breaks from college. As much as I love my parents for letting us stay there. It was embarrassing at times and I felt like I was getting treated like a kid at some points even though I was married and had a kid. But it was still beneficial for my family to live there. I got so much help and my son couldn’t care less where we were living as long as it was safe and comfortable. So whether you live in an apartment, relative's home, mobile home, condo, or a house of your own. As long as you are safe, comfortable, and happy where you are living your baby will not care.
Their Clothing
Kids are messy and they grow like weeds and until they start to develop a style of their own there is no point investing so much money on clothes that they will grow out of quickly or get dirty. Most of the time they don't care about how the clothes look but more so how they feel about their bodies. I don't buy a lot of new clothes and I like shopping at thrift stores but even then their prices are going up to the price of new store-bought items at times. I usually just stick with clearance and thrift store items. Investing in expensive trendy clothes is so wasteful and it's frustrating seeing a cute outfit get ruined by blowouts and food stains.
Expensive Toys
I love buying my son toys. I have to control myself because I am a sucker for anything cute that he might like. My son is into cars and buses and every time I pass by the toy aisle and take a glimpse I have to fight the urge to buy my son any more toys and here's why. Kids don't care as much about toys as we think they do. Now don't get me wrong toys are great and when they are age appropriate help them in their development by exercising their creativity. But they may play with their new toys for an hour and never touch them again. I know because my son has a playroom full and his favorite toy is a pot from my kitchen and our TV remote. Save your money and don't get too excited. Buy them a few toys and resist the urge to fall into the never-ending quest to find the “perfect toy” that your kid will play with every day.
Now always talk to your pediatrician if you suspect that your child is not hitting certain milestones. Majority of the time it’s normal. It took my son forever to learn how to roll over and it's taking him a little longer to develop his vocabulary. As parents, it's hard not to compare your baby with other babies because you want to make sure they are not falling behind. But babies don't live on a schedule, they don't turn 6 months and go “time to roll over!” that same day. Most of the time your child will hit their milestones eventually and sometimes earlier. Like most things, practice makes perfect and you can make it fun. Every day my son and I would have what I called a “rollover book camp”. I would play with my son and practice the movements of rolling over until he got it on his own and once he did he was doing it all the time. So just be patient, babies don't have strict deadlines. But remember to speak with your child’s pediatrician if you do have any concerns.
That concludes my list of everything that kids don't really care for. While there is a lot that kids don't care about there is one thing they care about more than anything which is receiving love from their parents. Always shower your baby with love and appreciation.
If I left out any other thing that parents care about and babies don't feel free to comment down below!!
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